Here i write my story one more time with my own english words,without google transaltion.The oter translations is only a drag and drop copy from the type from my homepage,im sure that this translations have many here i hope you can all understand.

My story was beginning with a "Softair-game" in august 2009.Softair you can google this word,its similär how "paintball" but we use only 6mm little ammunation to shoot on the other gamers.i had swallowed 2or3 from this plasticbullets by the a big softair match.
So,in the end from august2009 i had noticed a little hard thing under my bottom left rib,i can feel it with my fingers,i has the form from one of the plasticbullets and i had fear before a poisoning.That´s why i go to my housedoctor,but she and her college don´t can find the hard thing under my rib with her fingers but then one of this 2 female doctors say we can make a sonography.So they give me to adresses from other doctors,they have the sonography adress was a very old doctor they don´t work anylonger and the other was the Hospital "Pfeiffersche Stiftung" and in the hospital she say i should come to one from his surgeon.As i was by him he can find the hard thing under my rib and then he said,we can only clarify it complete with a colonoscopy.So that was made on the date 08.31.2009 and this was my most wrong decision what i can do.

The colonoscopy was 2 hours long but in the documents the doctors has write only 30minutes and as medicine for the Sedation she has write only "propofol" but that must also be wrong.then as i was woke up i fell how extreme drunken,after the next half hour i fell better and then the very young nurse told me that i had try to atack her and i had try to stand up from my bed and i was in a crazy condition.I was extreme suprised then until today i don´t can remember on this things.then only come the female OA. Doctor Heide Katrin W. they had made this crazy colonoscopy and told me with a naughty voice that they don´t can find a foreign body in my colon and she had send me at home.Today i have a female doctor friend(anesthesiologist),she don´t work as doctor because she als a victim from criminal doctors and she hate this coruption system,so she is today a very good friend and she had told me that i can not in this crazy condition by the colonoscopy only with "propofol" she is sure that i had become a second medicine how "dormicum" or so and the amount from 260mg is very to much for a 30minutes long Colonoscopy.And this has me confirmed a anonym worker from the Hospital"Pfeiffersche stiftung" in some emails,he had write me a email over my homepage.He mean this not normal a normal colonoscopy goes maximum 45minutes
and in my documents man can read "30minutes".Im sure that the doctors do what with my body in this 2 hours what i don´t know until today.

Then the first problems i had became in the second night after the Colonoscopy,i woke up with wave occurring abdominal pain and then i go to the toilet and i had extreme much liquid diarrhea and after this the pain was away.Then in the next days it has started with the pressure in my stomach.In next weeks it was more and more and i go again to the doctors in my city internists time to 2.But she make only the Sonography and said,yes i look here much air in your stomach Mr and send me back home.In the next month the pressure was more and more,it was after some weeks very uncomfortable and my stomach started to will be round.I said to the doctors i look how a pregnant woman with this stomach but she said "Mr. ... you don´t can be pregnant,you are a men" that was the first from many stupid sentences what i have become to hear from this idiots.

After about 7 month(i was 8-10 times by some different doctors) i had first time the problem with laughing,screaming and crying.I have noticed firt time as i watched a funny scene in a TV Movie and as i wanted laughing i must stop this and i had the feel that i don´t can make my stomach small.Normal man make in fast contractions the stomac small and big if you laughing and if you scream then you make the stomach very small for a longer moment.A healthy human don´t notice this normal moves,but if you don´t can do this anylonger you notice but always if i told this a doctor she will send me to the psychiaty or she laughing over this or she don´t will believe me.Then in january 2011 was the next big problem,i had the first time problmes with micturition and the sperm has at the same time problems to come out from my penis.I was go with this in the hospital,because at the same moment my stomach was really hard and i had fear before a gut closure then since the colonoscopy i had only difficult bowel movement.She make the first abdominal X-ray and she said its all okay mr. go home.
Then i had bought a laxative and drink it and it help with my colon but the problems remained,with sperm and urinary until today its the same and my Urinary is today extreme ofter very dark and my sperm is only a little bit water,i think from my normal potency i only have today 10%.

Then the next extreme problems was come in february 2012.First in the beginning from feburary i had abruptly a feel from deafness on my complete skin with tingling in my my face on the lips and cheeks.But it was not really deaf then i can fell pain if try to hurt me with a needle.But iwas a strange feeling and this remained until today.I was with this again in a hospital she said again she don´t dan find a healthproblem by me.then i had 2 times in the february become a extreme hard stomach and i had again fear before a gut closure and i go to hospital but after 1-2 hours my stomach was again soft but all the time my stomach is remained so unnormally big round.
Then in the end from february it was extremest,i had in the complete february again and again become extreme short moments with fell from itch on many different places in my body and if scratch this places it was always a place on there i can see a vein and then on the 02.26.2013 my complete veins has fell as were fire in there,my arms had trembled it had fell as my veins are burning and they veins was bigger at this moment much bigger.This was the first time that i had become fear that i must die and i go again to the hospital but the doctor had seen the the needle punctures and ask me,was you in the last time by other doctors and i say yes but she don´t had helped me and then he said,okay i don´t examination you you are a malingerer and send me a psychiatrist but at this time i know what is the psychitry(extreme dangerous psychodrugs and electric torture) but this guy was very stupid,he thought he can bring me to agressiv with extreme stupid questions,for example.And this was his first question to me after he was come in the room and said me that he is a psychatrist:Believe you on Alien´s they will beam you extraterrestrial radiation in your head? or wrap them secretly at home aluminum paper around the head from fear of radiation from space? and some more questions from tghis kind,im sure he wanted to bring me with this ti agressiv,because then he would can say im a dangerous for other humans and he must bring me with forced in a looked psychiatry,but i was to intellegent for this shit.I remained quiet and said to all his stupid questionsonly:NO

after this my veins was remained so unnormaly big for the next 8 month.but before i more in the timeline it had give on the 02.26.2012 a other big problem.In this evening my vas deferens was extreme big and the pain was extreme for 20minutes and then it was over and the vas deferens was to 90% normaly again but my potence was from this moment much fewer.on thenext morning i go to a Urologist,i show him my penis and balls and he said only,it looks normaly,but since my veins had burns was the biggest veins on the back from my penis EXTREME big remained,i told this him but he was only angry and then as i asked him:can you give me a copy from this ball sonography what yoz have made from me and then he SCREAM!!!!: Here are my rules of the game and if you don´t finish now to vexation me then go out from here and then after 2minutes was more quiet and said with a little angry voice i send you to a CT and then it was made on the 02.28.2012 but the radiologist said we can see nothing unormally things.(i mean this CT what your mother had looked)

then from this time i had my first little breathing problems and a permament fast heartbeat and many times i must stoped walking on the street and bend forward to become better air.Then it was so until to october 2012.In the Occtober my veins went back to their normal size.And then my body fell very strange and my i had frist time problems with my eye´s.My eyesight was bader in a very short moment and my heart had not anylonger beat so extreme and my breast fell how hollow in there.I fell more and more powerless.but again i don´t become help from doctors.she send me again and again a psychitrist,5 times overall.but this is funny only 2 from 5 psychiatrist´s say that she will give me psychodrugs but i have surely said go out from eyes with your drugs.
in the next month i had sometime problems with my bodypower,i notice i have not anylonger so much power in my left arm and i can hold it not more so easy high how before that timepoint,in the next days i noticed the same in other parts from my body,right arm,left leg right leg and my eye´s was bader and bader,a short time i had fear before that i become blind.Then i had try tu use a coffein pile and only 100mg had help me after 30minutes and then it worked for 30minutes,in this 30 minutes was my heart extrem fast aand my eyesight was much better but after this 30minutes it was over and i had extreme problems with my cycle.I go sometimes again in other hospitals,also in 3 otehr citys but nobody helped me and she said everytime its only all in your head.and as i was collapsed in a train she said it was Hyperventilation but without panicatack lol.i had in my complete live never had a panicatack.and i don´t was in panic.but from november 2012 until march 2013 i had many times problems with breathing and heartbeat.3-4 times it was so extreme that i had fear to die again and in the trian it was so extreme that my hands was in the obstetrician.on this evening the doctors in Berlin had let me wait 10 hours in the emergency without help and then finaly she had maid a EKG and asked me:was you in panic mr.? i said no and he said it was only hyperventialtion and now i can go this night after this my complete body was so weak that i had pain if i wanted to bit in a bread the collaps the last what i could notice wa my heartbeat and i could see my hands.
then it was better with breathing and heartproblems until some days ago.
Today I woke up with severe pain in the left neck area, can not turn left right head. Besides, I have been struggling for 3 days again with shortness of breath, the night before was the time again with 2 short but heavy heart stumble along.

oh i forget to say:in the time between october 2012 and march 2013 i had many time muscle twitching for some weeks,first not so bad and latehr overall in body,icould looked it on my breast and my arms and legs and so on.

Summary: today you can see my extreme round stomach and dark veins in my eye´s and the extreme big vein on my penis.

Okay thats my story with my best english what i can write.

The rest results are not all in english but i think laboratory results you can read nevertheless.

All the other translations i have made with google translator.

with friendly greet
René Meske 26 years old from Germany


UPDATE Today is 17.01.2014


So before i send this text to some Hospitals i write the newest details:

Since 2 weeks i ca nhear a whistling noise on both ears.And i feel dizzy,the HNO doctor said with ears is all ok.I lie the most time in my bed.I do not care who helps me but it does finally happen what.


pls use for first contact my emailadress:

English version of my medical diary:


in this document the date´s are in germany,we write: day,month,year and not how in english month,day,year. but in the complete english story with my own english i had write the dates in english

My health : I breathe very heavily and my heart stumbles again noticeably , I 'm generally strongly refuted the whole body .


Today is 23/01/2013

I was able to sleep last night again very difficult because of heavy breathing and now since about 10:00 clock , I have always strong pressure feeling in the brust.Die fear of Herzatacke is very high right now but I hope as always that the atacken subside


Today is 26/01/2013

It is now 21:41 Clock my lungs vibrate again for a few hours and I have not found a doctor again today is willing to help me when I get up out of bed a few steps and falls over my breathing heavier but immediately also lying I do myself every 3.Atemzug very schwer.Ich I 'm afraid that what was made on 31.8.2009 with me by doctors really do not überleben.Von now on I will write an entry every day and if the entries can demolish any reads this assume that I 'm dead .


Today is 27/01/2013

Today I have a heavy feeling , and second by second stabbing pain around the breast, alternate between left rechts.Ich times did last night that Mr Wolfgang holes called out again in a torture camp was stuck Psychiatry .


Today is 28/01/2013

Today I felt finally a little bit better but the whole time I an unnatural feeling heavy in the whole breast .


Today is 29/01/2013

Today I only had the heavy feeling in the chest otherwise no further deterioration .


Today is 30/01/2013

Today I was with Prof Dr Peter Malfertheiner at the University Hospital of Magdeburg with the ergebniss but that they wolen Although testing for porphyria with langwieriegen urinary collecting tests , and I do not think the rum that the appropriate tests are otherwise rode the rail prof very quickly on psychosomatic .


Today is 31/01/2013

Today I have the first contact with another affected by violence Psychiatry aufgenommen.Gesuundheitlich today I feel so-so this extremely heavy feeling in the chest , each input costs have just still a lot of power .


Today is 01/02/2013

Today we took the eight breathe a little better than yesterday but now I have always slight pain in the right thigh and the right thumb, probably stir forth from the weak heart and the associated lack of bleeding .


Today is 02/02/2013

Last night I had another wave-like Bauchschmerzen.Den day over again I felt extremely schwach.Schmerzen in the right thigh and the right thumb vorhanden.Darüber most of the time , the skin on the hands is easy one , it looks as if I had the Keep your hands are in water for hours .


Today is 03/02/2013

Today I searched again lying in bed with laptopvor the nose on the internet to help but wiedermal gefunden.Ich no noticeable by seconds herzausetzer and also some strong atemnot.Das had again today feeling of physical weakness makes itself increasingly bemrkbar.Außerdem I had today again a short time these wave-like abdominal pain .


Today is 04/02/2013

Today I felt very weak all day , while running waver a bit and my head feels as if every movement in legen.Außerdem cotton batting in body provide me several time and again most jerks but the inside of the right thigh. again I have found no help .


Today is 05/02/2013

Today sic hnix notable new has happened , my health is generally weak and dizzy I was today mehrfach.Ich currently trying to establish international contacts on the Internet .


Today is 06/02/2013

It has once again nothing new ergeben.Die pain in the right thigh and the right thumb is gone but I have every now and then a quick tickle on the inside of the right oberschenkelns and muscle twitch again.


Today is 07/02/2013

Last night I had another one resulting from heart failure , and today I had a conversation with another intresantes betroffenen.Mal 'll see what comes tomorrow .


Today is 08/02/2013

Since today feels my heartbeat scary differently to describe it is a piece schwer.Ich feel far better what the problem in terms breathless but still extremely limp , most of the time I'm back in bed only .


Today is 09/02/2013

Today I had extensive telephone calls with affected Psychiatrieterrorismus.Was terms of my health , I verspühre I unangehme the same heart beat like yesterday but even in the moment it goes.


Today is 10/02/2013

On the last night I had another great fear for my life because my heart was so weak and the adrenaline kept me up half the night wach.Im laufedes day , the whole back beruight a far piece .


Today is 11/02/2013

Today, my heart has indeed normalized compared to yesterday but I have always pinhole -like occurring pain in different body make and the skin on my hands always falls significantly , which hands dan see at times like this when I would spend hours gebadet.Ansonsten feels to my neck area and over again to ziehmlich deaf and I have occasionally slight whiz ears .


Today is 12/02/2013

Today I was doing something better and since 2 weeks I was finally back in front of the door at the grocery store and have something to eat , I have gekauft.Darüber gester nwieder had a intresante kontaktaufnahme .


Today is 13/02/2013

Today this has nothing worth mentioning ereignet.Heute I feel tired and have at times ringing in the ears and waver a bit when walking .


Today is 14/02/2013

Today I had another one or the other intresante talk with other concerned now I must say that the whole world apparently only from Koruption and abuse of power because it besteht.Gab ​​sometime not even something called commitment of the nobles , rofl.Naja my health today : Powerless with slightly strange Herzschlag.Ansonsten no change


Today is 15/02/2013

Today nothing has happened I've only played a little computer and was tired the whole day in bed .


Today is 16/02/2013

Today I was back in bed most of the time because of my weak heartbeat.


Today is 17/02/2013

I was feeling a little better today , only to night I had a strange feeling in the face , and most in the nose, it felt as if the nose falls in on itself and breathe through your nose a lot harder for me .


Today is 18/02/2013

Last night was back to hell , until I could not sleep because of strong tingling legs and if I could sleep times I had kinky Alpträume.Heute morning then I was so exhausted that I could hardly stand on my legs konnte.Es will generally fall asleep with the limbs getting worse.


Today is 19/02/2013

Today went a little better than yesterday but the exhaustion of my muscles is always frightening , partly I vacillate while running and cant almost due to weak leg muscles .


Today is 20/02/2013

I just got back a few popular phone calls geführt.Gesundheitlich I was feeling a little better today than yesterday.


Today is 21/02/2013

Today I once again had a slightly better day and I was out side again today even for shopping .


Today is 22/02/2013

Nothing special .


Today is 23/02/2013

Today I woke up with an extreme weakness feeling in my left arm which is held for a few hours , at the time the arm was also ziehmlich blow .


Today is 24/02/2013

I feel like the force of each muscle decreases more and more , now available in the poor .


Today is 25/02/2013

The weakness is in the left arm and leg palpable continue .


Today is 26/02/2013

In the last two nights I was very poor sleep only 2 hours max on piece and when I woke up was the body I was lying on the side for a while during the short taub.Auch schlaffasen me it was not good due to constant nightmares by cynical murderers doctors . however I think that this dream a sort of self- preservation drove my body was sleeping in which the heartbeat hat.In dangerously low cut I had this violent nightmares was thus my heart beat high gehalten.Ein similar effect everyone has ever experienced in the dream, eg, if you dreams that you have to toilet and then when you're awake you realize that you actually pushes the bladder.


Today is 27/02/2013

Last night I was able to my surprise once again sleep well and that too without nightmares .

But throughout the day , I again very clearly felt my heartbeat and palpitations had temporarily short but if I'm going quiet it somewhat .


Today is 28/02/2013

Today we went to some extent , but sometimes heart sting a little .


Today is 01/03/2013

For about 13h I have to struggle with a weak heartbeat, the heart feels as if vibrate the individual proposals .


Today is 02.03.2013

Last night I woke up around 3am and then had mild eye pain when I saw in the mirror was all pink eyes Weis verfärbt.Aber is also quite fast again abgeklungen.Den day it went relatively well only if I have the eyes to the side or me turn up or down without the head ache then move your eyes more .


Today is 03/03/2013

Today I still have the same eye pain gestern.Außerdem as a piece of my left hand was now suddenly went numb far the very strong unpleasant itch of vessels in hand vor.Gegen evening was my heartbeat again somewhat weak .


Today is 04/03/2013

My left hand is still the same today as yesterday itch only without the wahnsinige , my heart is once again temporarily schwach.Ansonsten a relatively good day .


Today is 05/03/2013

Today I once again had a better day and was again outside .


Today is 06/03/2013

Today I had a shitty day back and lying in bed with a weak heartbeat .


Today is 07/03/2013

Today I was doing it very well and I was almost constantly in bed with the weak Herzschlag.Außerdem seemed my heart to make me wiggle inside, sounds weird but it was like that.


Today is 08/03/2013

Today I again had a better day rarely the weak heartbeat .


Today is 09/03/2013

Today I only had a short time between weak heartbeat again but otherwise it went .


Today is 10/03/2013

Today I again had often the weak heartbeat but otherwise no change .


Today is 11/03/2013

Today I had slight breathing problems again and was very weak and powerless .


Today is 12/03/2013

Today I have half the day felt the faint heartbeat and was at times the left hand taub.Einfach way.


Today is 13/03/2013

Today I had time to time the burn in the veins in the hands otherwise it was a better day than usual


Today is 16/03/2013

From now on I 'm only once a month or when an entry etwsa noteworthy happened ist.Eben I had tried to get some sleep but that did not suddenly arms and legs were tingling and I was afraid of a heartbeat .


Today is 20/04/2013

Meanwhile , my condition has continued to deteriorate noticeably , my eyesight is due to lack of blood flow to the eyeballs now reduced to the extent that the blose see with the eyes to become painful ist.Zeitweise I've also always atemnot.Ich 'm sure I will as long as the no longer endure


Today is 05/05/2013

Since 3 days my heart beats again noticeably schwach.Gerade it's 3:06 clock at night and always fall asleep when I try to get severe heart stumbles and chest always feels heavier an.Wer looking one probably this is my last eintrag.Falls not I write tomorrow again a .


Today is 06/05/2013

Last night I could not sleep until about 5:00 clock morning a few hours before it ran the extreme heart stumble to the present day and also about the whole time I felt that my whole heart is not running zrund and when I tried to catch some sleep was the extreme heart stumbles off again, I'm afraid too long I do not do it


Today is 18/06/2013

After I was able to sleep last week meienr times to go to the extreme surprise normal heart stumbles when trying to fall asleep as the hammer blows against the inside of the chest feel now for 2 nights, then release times see how it is tonight .


Today is 04.10.2013

Today I woke up with severe pain in the left neck , the head can not really left drehen.Außerdem I've been struggling for 3 days again with shortness of breath , the night before the time was right back with two short but heavy heart stumble along .